Friday, November 11, 2011

The Stockmarket Explained...

A man wants to invest, but is terribly confused about the stock market. He asks his friend, an investment banker, to advise him.

"Here is what you do, you take your savings and buy 10 chickens and a rooster. Those chickens will lay eggs and breed," his friend advises. "Not only will you have eggs to sell, but after some time you'll have a 100 chickens and expand your business."

"That is great. I shall do that."

"However, there is a risk."

"There is?"

"Yes, if there is a flood, the chickens will drown and you will lose all of your investment."

"Oh, no! That is horrible. What am I going to do if that happens?"

"You should have bought ducks."


  1. Heh, heh. Good one! It sums up how I feel about investing. :)

  2. So that's what they mean when they say 'investments can go down as well as up'.

    I never realised they meant underwater!

  3. and for political ideologies explained too....

  4. Pretty funny!
    "Should have bought ducks." That quacks me up.

  5. It all makes sense now. Why don't I feel better?

  6. @David, it can be like that. Glad you enjoyed it.

    @Alistair, bit of a titanic fiasco lately.

    Haven't seen the cow joke before, funny.
    Really liked your book post, brother;)

    @Laoch, similar reaction when I heard it.

    @dbs, me too.

    @PUNwater, nice!

    @Vinny, you bought chickens, didn't you?
    Should have gone with the Grackles.

  7. Grackles don't swim but they can fly so I guess they'll do better. I wonder if Grackle eggs make a good turnover...

  8. Investing, legalized gambling.

  9. Dear Readers,
    We are currently experiencing technical difficulties.
    Negotiations with hardware squatters have been reduced to four letter words.
    We shall respond to much appreciated comments when more extensive vocabulary resumes.

    Please join us for a complimentary illusory nostalgia session on the topic of wood cabins and pigeon mail.

    With regrets,


  10. Oh dear, it's not only the economy that's gone haywire!

    I'm tucking bills under my mattress. Ugh.


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