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Showing posts with label Musings. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Musings. Show all posts

Sunday, October 21, 2012

Perspective Through Prehistory



From time to time, particularly in the current global climate, a reminder of how all of Homo sapiens spent the majority of its existence is required.

Here is is a brief and highly selective list of "It was much worse in prehistoric times."

1. Prehistoric humans had to hunt their food with flint on a stick. In return, the food hunted them back with teeth and claws. When the food left, humans migrated with them.

2. Public transportation was by foot only.

3. There were no stores or cities. They had to craft and make their own belongings.

4. There was no medication. There were no hospitals. At best, there was a healer, who administered ground up plants while chanting.

5. There was no one to sue if things went wrong.

6. If they fell off a mountain, they died. If something became infected, they died. If something ate them, they died. They ate what they found and hoped for the best. There were surprises. Average life expectancy was probably 30.

7. They lived with parasites and without toilet paper.

8. The infrastructure was usually trying to kill them.

And if you live somewhere where none of this sounds familiar, you are fortunate.

Saturday, January 14, 2012

If Cats Ruled The World




We would live in colonies without hierarchy.
There would be no wars. Only the occasional posturing, hissing and growling.

Our mothers would teach us to play with our food.

The Olympics would include: Short-distance rolling, endurance napping and target grooming.
There would be no catnip doping scandal.

The government would offer cuddling rebates for energy efficiency during the winter.
Everyone would be responsible for their own waste disposal: Don't forget to dig, deposit and cover.
Vacuum cleaners would be banned due to noise pollution.
China would manufacture high quality bottle caps, string and other battable objects. 
['battable': See Revised Cat Dictionary]

We would get to play with new kittens several times a year for early human training, behavioral conditioning and educational purposes.

I have to go. My master just purred my name.