Pixar Worthy. If Pixar Had a Maniacal Uncle With A Dark Sense Of Humor. Alright, Possibly A Very Dark Sense Of Humor.

Cave Johnson is the CEO and founder of Aperture Science Laboratories, which manufactures a wide range of products from bullets, affectionately called "Resolution Pellets", lasers which are nothing more than "thermal discouragement beams", to robots. A month ago, Mr. Johnson began offering a series of  investment opportunities to its investors.




For further investment opportunities, such as investing in the future of robotics click here

In addition, Aperture Laboratories is always looking for test subjects for its new portal project.  The portal device is a new quantum hole tunneler which allows participants to contribute to society until they expire pass a series of test chambers.  Here is a brief introduction of what a test subject might experience. Please be advised that regulation requires that test subjects are woken form time to time, while waiting for their turn to access the test chambers.



Corporations are the way of the future and science is always used for the benefit of mankind.

On the surface Portal 2 appears to be a puzzle solving game, but what is it really teaching our young and impressionable "children"?

1. Corporations do not always have your best interests at heart.
2. Don't trust everyone who offers you cake as a reward.
3. Science is fun, including physics.
4. Staring at art is invigorating.
5. How science is used is important.
6. Trust your instincts, that voice of authority might turn out to be nefarious or misleading or just evil.
7. Don't buy (into) everything someone is trying to sell you.
8. If science goes incredibly wrong, chances are it was caused by human error or megalomania.
9. Number nine would reveal a spoiler.
10. As would number ten.

Valuable lessons.

Cave Johnson voiced by actor J.K. Simmons.
Wheatley voiced by Stephen Merchant (actor on the original British version of The Office)

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Are you still here? You could watch Robot Cooperation or get off the computer. Go on, get outside, enjoy the outdoors, read a book or whatever else it is you do when you're in the real physical world.
Cave Johnson, we're done here.