Tuesday, April 23, 2013

Elevator

I am known to wander. I have been accused of wandering in the wrong direction with such confidence that people feel obligated to follow my lead, only to be disappointed that I do not know where I am going either.

I found myself wandering in a high tech building looking for the stairs to exit it. The universal symbol for stairs did not appear to exist. I was thus obligated to seek out one of many confounding elevators, which serviced certain floors but not the one I needed. Finding the right elevator should not be this puzzling in a place where most of its inhabitants appeared as confused as I was.  Finally, I found a set of respectable looking elevators, waited and was confronted by doors opening only to display that they were at their full capacity.

Tired and impatient, I looked around me and saw one elevator awaiting me with open doors.  I quickly stepped in, the doors closed immediately before I had time to notice that it looked somewhat industrial. I pressed "M" and the elevator with me as its lone occupant began to move up instead of down.

Dead Space

I pressed a few useless numbered buttons, next to a card swipe, to prevent it from arriving at the top executive floor. To no avail. The broken elevator was on an ear-popping mission to reach its heavenly destination with me in it.

Top floor. The doors opened wide as did my eyes. It was windy. I was looking at a copter, blades still rotating. Several individuals were running toward me with their cargo. They belonged in this elevator. I clearly did not. I wished I was dreaming or watching a movie. Neither applied.

They were as surprised to see a lone individual in their elevator as I was desperate to be anywhere but in it. I briefly weighed my options:

I am a moron and walked into the wrong elevator. Too honest.
Quality Control. Excellent work, gentlemen. Not credible.
Bond, James Bond...Too cuckoo's nest.

In the end, I opted for silent VIP in suit, pretending that this is exactly where I am supposed to be at this precise moment in time. They were preoccupied and did not ask questions. I offered no explanation.

I waited until they exited at their floor, before I stepped out. I looked back at the elevator.
Instead of call buttons there was a big red sign: FOR STAFF ONLY! TO HELIPAD.

I walked out of this adventure as quickly as I could.

11 comments:

  1. I've seen many an action/adventure movie start in a similar manner. Then again, I've also seen a few horror movies that started the same way. Either way, I'm glad you're okay & not being stalked by a Japanese ghost. They're the worst.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That was exactly what I was thinking on the way up. Too many games, too many movies.
      The way down was the most awkward elevator ride experience. Ever.

      Delete
  2. Clearly this was the first part of your recruitment test. No doubt they have big plans for you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hahahaha.
      One worries about our future if this is what they're hiring.

      Delete
  3. You could have put your hand to your ear, and pretended you were talking to someone through an earpiece, even muttering "yes Agent Smith"..lol.

    OO!

    Or, as you and your new occupants were descending in the elevator you could have announced... "well, now that I have gathered you all here...."

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. BoL.
      We think alike. Those thoughts went through my head and may have resulted in inappropriate smirks.

      Delete
    2. considering... yeah. inappropriate. :)

      Delete

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