It is no secret, at least in the blogosphere, that I peruse cat videos. During my recent cat video travels I noticed something, because I am strange and notice patterns in trivial things.
Russian cats appear to be evolving at a rapid rate.
In America, cats sleep in sinks. In Japan, Maru entertains by reposing in boxes. But in Russia, cats are washing dishes.
Exhibit One: Cat washes dishes.
Meanwhile, Flirt, our resident lovable calico moron, (trust me on this, she is as affectionate as she is stupid), spends 20 minutes trying to pull a door open that needs to be pushed. I have been forced to endure her desperate struggles for years. She still has not figured it out. In America, many videos show cute kittens that are still playing with round objects. But in Russia, cats have begun imitating human behavior and are feeding themselves.
Exhibit Two: Cat holding human container with food.
Conclusion: The Russian cats are going to invade us. Nobody will see it coming. You have been warned. Do not worry; I am training a highly effective cat army to defend our scented absorbent kitty litter by... *plaintive meowing*
...hang on. One of our cat soldiers is stuck behind the couch. Again. Walking backwards does not occur to her. Rescue team has been deployed.